Where I Should Have Wanted to Be in 5 Years

One day, I was riding home with my dad. We were listening to talk radio, which he prefers and I don’t mind, but it wouldn’t be my first choice. They were talking about how people always have something about themselves that few others have and because of it, they are proud of themselves. The lady on the radio was saying that hers is that she owns her home. She said that her friends around her rent theirs, and she doesn’t look down on them for renting, she’s just proud of herself.

While they were talking I thought about why I’m proud of myself. I’m proud that I hold a college degree. I worked hard for that piece of paper and put in a long time. In my branch I’m one of few who went to college, and even one of fewer who graduated from it. I don’t look down on others and think that they haven’t accomplished what they should have. I think some of them would have better lives and jobs if they had a college degree, but what they do with their lives is their choice, not mine.

A few days ago I was looking in a binder that I’ve kept since young womens with all my handouts, quotes, and stories that I’ve gotten through the years. On one of the pages there are drawings that my YW leaders made us do. It’s called “Where I Want to be in 5 Years.” I was a Senior in High School when we did this activity, so I wrote that I wanted to be married, have some kids, and have my degree. Well, the only thing I have is my degree. It’s also the only goal that I have complete control of fulfilling. I can’t get married or have kids by myself, but I can get through school by myself.

So, I changed these goals a little. I changed “get married in the Temple” to “Be worthy to get married in the Temple and become the person that I would want to marry.”I know what kind of husband I want, and I need to be the kind of woman that will attract that kind of guy. I think I’m almost there, but I still have a few things to work on. It’s funny because I’ve sometimes been told that I’m not married because no one is good enough for me. Well, I’m working on me, and he’d better be working on him so when we meet he won’t worry about me being out of his league.

I changed “Have 2 children” to “Be a good role model and make habits now that will make me a good mother.” I’ve always been told that when I have kids is not a good time to try to fit in scripture study or prayer. I’ve watched my sister and her two kids, and I’m not sure how she finds time to brush her teeth. being a mom is so time consuming. But if I already am in the habit of reading my scriptures and saying prayers, I’ll be more likely to find time to do it.

I already have one goal down, and I’m still working on my two new goals, but I think over-all I’m doing pretty good. And I think those goals are never ending. I will find ways to improve all the time, until the day I die.

I’m not disappointed that I haven’t fulfilled my goal of being married and having kids. Those things will come in the Lord’s time. But in the meantime, I must have other things He wants me to do.